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I think the motives for art are very

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general and they have much to do with

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commemoration.

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Like telling a story is a way of

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embodying

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uh some facts, some history. You want to

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tell the story of your ancestors. If

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you're you're an immigrant family, so

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you came to to North America, let's say,

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you know, 1850, there's a whole family

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story. So many writers want to write

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about that story and they're

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commemorating their own ancestors and

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commemorating the generation. So I think

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that instinct is very strong.

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When I first read Alice in Wonderland

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and Alice in the Looking Glass, I was

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only about eight or nine. They were the

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great gifts of my grandmother,

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um, really the great gifts of my of my

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whole childhood as it as it seems in

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retrospect. I have the my original copy

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at home and it's all dogeared. It's a

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nice book with illustrations, beautiful

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illustrations. And as soon as I open it,

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I've just memorized everything. I can

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remember all these passages and I

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remember the little drawings on the top

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of the page and so forth. So, it's it's

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one of the uh works of art that I've

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memorized because it's very deeply

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imprinted in my brain. Those classic

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children's books have really been deeply

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imprinted in my soul. And so, I probably

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think of Alice in Wonderland

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every day of my life. And Lewis Carol

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became a writer with whom I identified

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in different ways. He was very very

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playful

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and very funny and subversive and some

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of the humor is dark. It's a shockingly

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dark humor for children's books and some

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of it's whimsical and childlike. So I

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like to think that I embody all those

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traits in my own writing that Lewis

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Carol obviously had. There are many

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things we can take away from Alice in

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Wonderland. of the looking glass. But

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one of the primary

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thoughts that I came away as a little

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girl, I think, is that a little girl,

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Alice is about 10, a little girl can

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have wild adventures in the world that

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are actually pretty nightmarish. And

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yet, the little girl doesn't panic. She

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doesn't run away screaming. She doesn't

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burst into tears. She sometimes is

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concerned and she may be a little cons

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little worried but she doesn't

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become hysterical. So it's an example of

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a children's book in which a child who

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happens to be a girl and that was

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important. A little girl sees all sorts

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of adults behaving very badly. I mean

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they're calling for one another's heads

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to be cut off. They're doing really

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awful things. But the little girl comes

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away from it with some degree of

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maturity

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and it sends a signal of control that a

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child can have some control over her

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environment and she doesn't have to

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panic. So I think because Alice is a

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maybe a typical upper middle class

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British girl of the 19th century, those

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qualities maybe are very attractive that

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one doesn't become hysterical.

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One always keeps control and Alice is

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always thinking to herself in a very

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logical and rational way. So I think I

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inherited some of that for my own

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personal life.

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Oprah magazine had a feature some years

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ago for women writers to interview their

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own mothers.

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And I thought it was maybe a little

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silly idea and but I interviewed my

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mother and I was totally astounded and

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that gave me the idea not not just for

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one novel but for more than one. I mean

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my mother had so many adventures and

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experiences

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uh we never knew the children never knew

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she never talked about herself. My

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grandmother who was Jewish and

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repudiated Judaism.

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Uh I never asked her any questions. I I

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didn't I was too young. I didn't know.

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If I had asked her, she might have

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answered. But I'm so sorry that never

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happened. But my mother said,

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she said, "I'm so ashamed because my

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mother gave me away when I was 9 months

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old." And so my mother started crying

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and I I had never heard my mother talk

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that way. And she and I was stunned. She

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said, "I was given away because we were

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too poor and they didn't they couldn't

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take care of me. So I was given away to

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an aunt and uncle." But there were there

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were eight children in the family and

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she was given away. So she said I cried

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about it every day. And I couldn't

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believe my mother. She never talked

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about that. So So I wrote a novel. I

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wrote a couple of novels. One is called

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Missing Mom. It's basically about my

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mother and been other experiences. The

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idea of being given away and being

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ashamed and crying.

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and she said how she used to go back to

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the old household and she would come

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down the road and they would say go back

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home you don't belong here and she said

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I cried all the time she started crying

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she was like 81 years old so to me that

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was fantastic so if anyone has any

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experiences like that interviewing a

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grandparent could it change your life

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really I never knew my mother I never

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knew my mother had that experience so to

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me that was is an eye openener.

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If you're writing about real people, of

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course, you you might want to

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transferography it so it's not not so

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obvious. I mean, obviously people change

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names, they change descriptions, they

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change places. The idea of somebody

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giving a baby away is not that unusual

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in fairy tales, you know. So, one of the

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archetypes is a baby's found in the bull

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rushes. You know, a baby's given away.

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Um, Heathcliffe and Weathering Heights

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is an infant who just sort of shows up

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and nobody knows who the mother is or

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the father is. So, my mother had an

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experience that was somewhat universal.

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So, you you can always write about a

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universal experience, but of course, I

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would not write about my actual mother.

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And if I tried to in a memoir, I would

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make sure that that she read it or she,

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you know, it was all right. Cuz as

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people get older, they get less they

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care less about these things. The people

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she would have been embarrassed about

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were all dead. I mean, everybody, she

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was the last in her family. There were

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nine children in her family and they all

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died. So, by the time she talked about

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this, they were gone, you know. So there

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are many things you can do. I think that

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one out not to exploit other people and

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never hurt anybody. I never use your

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writing to hurt anybody. That's that's

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not a good motive. Some people use

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writing to settle scores. You do see

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that in Philip Roth sometime he's

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writing about women he knew. But I don't

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think that's the best motive for

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writing.

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Throughout my life, I've been really

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captivated by mystery and I've written a

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number of mystery suspense novels. I I

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really think that at the heart of our

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experience as pe as human beings, as

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adults, we have a memory of mysteries in

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childhood. And I think that the the

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great mystery writers like like uh

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Raymond Chandler and Earl Stanley

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Gardner and Agatha Christie, I really

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think those people

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Patricia Highmith definitely that

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something happened to them in their

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childhoods that they really were very

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very in the grip of of mystery and

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bewilderment.

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And so they keep writing mystery,

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detective fiction and pursuing some some

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narrative that comes to an ending

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because the detective mystery form

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always has an ending. It the last

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chapter always has a an ending. It's a

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it's a resolution that you don't always

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find in in literature. And so when I

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think about my own life, I think there

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are many mysteries. And I had this idea

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at some point maybe 20 years ago. An

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unsolved mystery is a thorn in the

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heart. That'll be the first line of a

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memoir, a story, or an essay. So I

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actually wrote something with that. It's

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it's it's a memory of something that

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happened to a girlfriend of mine, a

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classmate in high school. It didn't

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really happen to me, but it happened to

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her. She was the first girl. She was the

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first person in my whole life who

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committed suicide. Now, we didn't really

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know at the time. It was kept secret

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that she had committed suicide, but she

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died. She was only 18. So, why did she

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die? And her parents maybe covered it

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up, you know, they didn't want to talk

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about it. So, an unsolved mystery is a

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thorn in the heart. So, it was like 40

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years before I wrote it. I suggest to

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any emerging writer whether young or old

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or whatever that you think of some

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mystery in your life and you certainly

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may have that first line which I've

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given to writing students an unsolved

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mystery is a thorn in the heart and that

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is your first line of your story an

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unsolved mystery is a thorn in the heart

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and just think about it you may think

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about it for several days or weeks or

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months but something will come to you

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and like what's the second line? I would

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suggest that's the first paragraph and

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then you have another paragraph. I

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wouldn't make it all one paragraph. I

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would have that just by itself and then

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like when I was 10 years old, you know,

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when I was in college, when my father

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moved out, when my mother got ill, you

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know, that next paragraph is the thorn

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in your heart that you've never been

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able to to deal with.

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Well, another assignment is to revisit a

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place that you that means a lot to you

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in your in your memory. Deep in our

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brains, really deep in the deepest part

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of our brains are the memories very

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powerfully encoded of our the first room

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you ever lived in, the first house you

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lived in, the first people you saw, your

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your maybe your young parents, they were

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young maybe when you were born, and then

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your grandparents. All those memories

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are deep in your brain. So if you can

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evoke them by a certain smell, for me it

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was the smell of lilac. It was a lilac

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bush right outside my window when I was

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a little girl. And the smell of a farm

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of barns, a hay barn, the sight of

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chickens or cats or something in a farm

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that evokes a whole lot of memory for

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me. So the assignment is to take a

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memory, the earliest memory you have and

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to try to evoke it and write about it

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very powerfully. And if you write about

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it powerfully, when you finish it, you

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may have the beginning of a